Getting married is a huge deal – not only are you about to enter a completely new phase of your life with another person, you’ve also got the added pressure of planning a wedding and all the logistics that come with such a huge event. It’s natural to feel a lot of nerves and even experience jitters as the day draws near. Feeling nervous about getting married doesn’t mean you don’t want to be with your partner or that you don’t want to call off the wedding. It just means you’re processing a lot of emotions at once. When pre-wedding jitters start to become debilitating, like affecting your sleep and appetite, that’s when you have to take action. When wedding jitters start to creep up, do the following.
Open Up to Your Mate
The first step to mitigating pre-wedding jitters is communication, especially with the person you’re going to be marrying. You are life partners after all, and you shouldn’t be keeping things from one another. When we start to experience jitters, we don’t often realize it, but we start pulling away from our partner or withdrawing into ourselves, which can harm your relationship. Talking to your spouse-to-be can help ease your anxiety. They might have similar feelings, so they can offer reassurance and support, and working through your worries together can strengthen the relationship. You will also be able to put your heads together and come up with a plan.
Therapy & Counseling
Getting married can exert a lot of emotional stress on you, and the intervention of a professional can really help ease it. If you are doing a premarital preparation course, consider bringing this up with the person who is helping you. They can help you find healthy ways to cope and deal with the situation. You can also consider getting a therapist who specializes in marriage and anxiety counseling. According to Dr. Piper Walsh, a psychologist near Orange County, California, “processing the emotions of getting married has to be done in a safe, supportive space so that you’re set up for success in your marriage.” Everyone brings their own baggage into a relationship, and that can lead to you feeling fearful around getting married. Instead of ignoring and bottling these feelings up, deal with them so they don’t become an issue once you’re married.
Focus on Self-Care & Wellness
When the wedding jitters hit, taking care of yourself becomes even more important. You need to be able to counter the anxiety and nervousness. Of course, things like exercise will be very helpful – you’ll get both a physical and emotional benefit. You can also add in practices like meditation and yoga to keep you calm. Another thing that might be helpful is to consider curbing caffeine for a bit as it tends to amp up your anxiety.
Don’t Do It Alone
One of the biggest causes of stress in the lead up to a wedding is all the planning involved. It’s like a job in and of itself! From guest lists to dresses, family concerns, finances and other details, it’s really overwhelming dealing with all these things which can create a whole lot of stress. One of the best things you can do is get wedding planning support and help. Perhaps you can have a member of your family do it, or you can hire a wedding planner who can help you manage everything. Taking a lot of the stuff off your plate will allow you to calm down.
Focus on the Positive
Human beings have a tendency to focus more on the negative than the positive, even in the lead up to an event like a wedding. Instead, focus on the positive aspects of your relationship and the upcoming wedding. It’s really important to remember the whole point of this event: you are about to marry the love of your life, and it’s going to be a joyful occasion. Think about how wonderful that is, and that will help you cope with the stress a lot better. Look forward to your wedding and your honeymoon and the new life you get to embark on together.
Pre-wedding jitters are normal and nothing to be ashamed of. After all, you’re going through a huge life change, so it’s natural that a lot of feelings will surface. The best course of action is to open up to people, get the support you need and to take care of yourself. Ultimately, you’ll be able to enjoy your wedding day for the joyous occasion it is.